Night Sweats and Sundowners

May I just say one more time that being forced into early menopause sucks?

Thank you...because it does.

For all you women out there who have experienced night sweats and survived, I applaud you. I am unsure how you did survive, to be honest. My bedroom temperature is approximately 50 degrees and I am still awakened every 30-40 minutes with a fire raging inside of me. Sleep, while really good and restful there for a while, has left me yet again. I understand why sleep deprivation is used as a torture device.

Now, imagine if you will, not only dealing with night sweats and lack of sleep, but also a psychopathic dog who has lost his mind. Yes, my beloved Titan has gone cuckoo. Apparently my waking him up throughout the night has created some sort of "sundowners disease" for him! Unfreakingbelievable. If I happen to be asleep for my allotted 30 minutes, he will get up, come to my side of the bed and whine. Now, this dog is five years old and has never, ever needed to go outside in the middle of the night. Not until now, that is.

So, Titan wakes me up and I get up and let him go outside. Of course, my other doggie, Trooper, has to go, too...not because he has to peepee but because he is terrified he will miss something. So, I let both dogs out approximately 3-4 times each night during the wee hours. They do nothing while outside. Talk about maddening. They literally go out the door, realize it is cold, and then turn around to come back in. There is no peeing. There is no eating of grass. There is no assaulting of any burglar. Since I refuse to take anymore medicine to help me sleep, I am then laying in bed, incredibly frustrated and even more unable to go to sleep. Honestly. if you are tired or in need of sleep, do not sign up to my bed buddy.

What else is so odd is how my night sweats and Titan's sundowners disease literally go away as the sun rises in the east. It is as if fairies have come and sprinkled magic pixie dust on us allowing us to slumber. Of course, this is also when I NEED TO GET UP!!! Beautiful Daughter gets up at 6:06am!!! Precious Son, 20 minutes later!!! ARGH!!!!! You have GOT to be kidding me!!!

I cannot tell you how frustrating and disappointing it is to be unable to get out of bed to fix breakfast for the kids before they go to school, but here I am. Dealing with the fatigue in general from the chemo is one thing...adding zero sleep on top of that makes getting up impossible. I love cooking breakfast for my family...I love seeing them off before they head out the door...I hate them having to come to me to say "goodbye".

I asked Dr. Horn last time if my menstruation cycles would return and he said that considering my age, they hopefully would. Who would have thought someone would want their period??? Well, I do. I would rather nature take its course than be forced into early menopause because of the chemo. It's so unnatural and quite aggravating. I was always very regular and on time...never had any problems along those lines and things were fine. But I will tell you this much, having your period, while inconvenient and crampy, is far better than no sleep, lying in wet pajamas, and giving your pooch sundowners.