St. Patrick's Day

I am not wearing green. Not because I don't like green or don't have anything green, I think I am simply refusing to wear green for general principle. I am pretty tired of being told what to do. I am relatively sure no one will pinch me because long before being used as a pin cushion for the medical and oncology communities, I hated to be pinched. Now? I will smack you. Hard.

So, rebelling when and where I can. It isn't that hard to imagine, if you know me. Sometimes I get pretty fed up with being a rule follower, an obeyer, legalistic. It is my nature to be those things, although I am not sure why. Some people just are, I guess. Maybe that is why I am such a crazy driver...I truly do not follow the rules of the road. Now, if everyone was respectful of the fact that I am the pacecar, I would not have to drive like a lunatic on fire.

Had my second MUGA scan this morning. That is the test where they check your heart for damage from the chemo. This test requires two needle sticks, the second one containing radioactive something-or-other. The MUGA tech was a very good stick and he got me on the first try, both times. Words cannot express how happy that makes me. After the first stick, I had to go back into the waiting room while I became radioactive. I played "dots" on my iPhone with a total stranger and won. Obviously the radioactive cocktail increased my intelligence because I usually lose at dots. Ah, medical technology.

Came on home and was dropping off clothes on the way back to bed. Jacket...living room. Shoes...hallway. Pants...bedroom. Hat and headwrap...floor. Goodnight. Asleep by 9am. Woke up at 2pm. I'm telling you what. This radiation better be doing something good inside of me because I certainly am losing a lot of time sleeping away the after effects.

Anyway, it's Wednesday and time is drawing close to the weekend. Precious Son will be going with his youth minister and some other uprising high school seniors to visit two Bible colleges he is interested in attending. What? A visit to colleges as if he is old enough to be attending college anytime soon?? How did this happen? He is my baby...all 6'4", 210 pounds of him.

Deep sigh...

Beautiful Daughter, Big Daddy, and I have plans, too, but I cannot go into detail yet. Suffice it to say that someone very, very special is the major focus of our weekend.

Have been online the past couple of nights looking/planning/scheming vacation plans for us. I truly want an incredible vacation for my family. They deserve it. It's been a rough haul and they deserve a getaway that allows them to literally "get away". Of course, we are going to a beach...which may not sound extraordinary to you, but when you figure in having to purchase your very first prosthetic bathing suit, then you see just one more reminder how things have changed.

Deeper sigh...

My left arm has been swelling a lot the past few days. To the point of hurting, actually. I had to take off my rings...wedding band and all. It was a sad day. I never take them off. It isn't out of fear that I will inundated with indecent proposals by men or anything crazy like that...it's just my visible connection to Big Daddy and I have worn them for two decades. I feel exposed without them. Naked. Oh wait! Can't feel naked...not with this body! Not now!!

Deepest sigh.

So, am not wearing green today. Perhaps a lovely shade of blue would be more appropriate.

Regardless, Happy St. Patrick's Day... Here is some history from Mark D. Roberts...

Today is St. Patrick’s Day. Most people think of this day as a time for wearing green and that’s about it (unless you’re Irish!). St. Patrick gets relatively little attention on his day, so I thought I might offer a few thoughts in his honor, including a prayer that is attributed to him.

Patrick’s story reads like an Indiana Jones-type adventure. Raised in Britain (yes, not Ireland), Patrick was captured by pirates in A.D. 405 when he was only sixteen years old. The kidnappers whisked him away to Ireland and sold Patrick into slavery. He spent eight years as a captive in this pagan land.

During his captivity, Patrick embraced the Christian faith of his upbringing, something that had mattered little to him beforehand. In his own words, Patrick explained: “And there the Lord opened the sense of my unbelief that I might at last remember my sins and be converted with all my heart to the Lord my God, who had regard for my abjection, and mercy on my youth and ignorance, and watched over me before I knew Him, and before I was able to distinguish between good and evil, and guarded me, and comforted me as would a father his son” (from The Confession of St. Patrick).

Inspired by a dream, Patrick finally escaped from Ireland and made his way back to his home in Britain. But, in time, he sensed God’s call to return to Ireland, of all places, in order to share the good news of Christ with the pagans there. Even though he feared he wasn’t sufficiently learned to be a missionary, Patrick returned to Ireland, where he found unprecedented success in his evangelistic endeavors. His experience of Irish language and culture during his years as a slave enabled Patrick to communicate the Christian gospel with unusual effectiveness.

Though we can’t be sure when Patrick died, tradition holds that he lived into his seventies and died on March 17 in the latter half of the fifth-century A.D. In twenty-five or thirty years of evangelistic work, he led thousands of Irish pagans to Christ and was responsible for Ireland’s becoming one of the most Christian nations in Europe. For this reason he is called “the apostle of the Irish.”

The story of Patrick reminds me, in a way, of Joseph’s experience in Egypt. In both cases, what kidnappers and slave masters intended for evil, God intended for good (Gen. 50:20). Today I want to celebrate, not only Patrick’s example of faithfulness, but also the mystery and majesty of God’s redemptive sovereignty. It’s not unusual for people who have experienced some particular trauma in life to end up ministering to others who suffer that same trauma. A friend of mine, for example, who was sexually abused by her pastor when she was a teenager, now has a tenderhearted ministry to women who have experienced similar abuse. Thus, St. Patrick serves as an example of how God can work all things together for good, even things which are quite evil.

The closing prayer today is attributed to St. Patrick, sometimes called his “Breastplate.” There are many different versions of this prayer, and we can’t be sure it originated with Patrick. Nevertheless, it faithfully represents his powerful faith in the triune God. The first line “I arise today” is sometimes translated as “I bind unto myself today.”

I arise today
Through a mighty strength, the invocation of the Trinity,
Through the belief in the threeness,
Through confession of the oneness,
Of the Creator of Creation.

I arise today
Through the strength of Christ's birth with his baptism,
Through the strength of his crucifixion with his burial,
Through the strength of his resurrection with his ascension,
Through the strength of his descent for the judgment of Doom.

I arise today
Through the strength of the love of Cherubim,
In obedience of angels,
In the service of archangels,
In hope of resurrection to meet with reward,
In prayers of patriarchs,
In predictions of prophets,
In preaching of apostles,
In faith of confessors,
In innocence of holy virgins,
In deeds of righteous men.

I arise today
Through the strength of heaven:
Light of sun,
Radiance of moon,
Splendor of fire,
Speed of lightning,
Swiftness of wind,
Depth of sea,
Stability of earth,
Firmness of rock.

I arise today
Through God's strength to pilot me:
God's might to uphold me,
God's wisdom to guide me,
God's eye to look before me,
God's ear to hear me,
God's word to speak for me,
God's hand to guard me,
God's way to lie before me,
God's shield to protect me,
God's host to save me,
From snares of devils,
From temptations of vices,
From everyone who shall wish me ill,
Afar and anear,
Alone and in multitude.

I summon today all these powers between me and those evils,
Against every cruel merciless power that may oppose my body and soul,
Against incantations of false prophets,
Against black laws of pagandom
Against false laws of heretics,
Against craft of idolatry,
Against spells of witches and smiths and wizards,
Against every knowledge that corrupts man's body and soul.

Christ to shield me today
Against poison, against burning,
Against drowning, against wounding,
So that there may come to me abundance of reward.

Christ with me,
Christ before me,
Christ behind me,
Christ in me,
Christ beneath me,
Christ above me,
Christ on my right,
Christ on my left,
Christ when I lie down,
Christ when I sit down,
Christ when I arise,
Christ in the heart of every man who thinks of me,
Christ in the mouth of everyone who speaks of me,
Christ in every eye that sees me,
Christ in every ear that hears me.

I arise today
Through a mighty strength, the invocation of the Trinity,
Through belief in the threeness,
Through confession of the oneness,
Of the Creator of Creation.

Amen.